Denial

- am I getting nostalgic again, even more on my past romantic relationships.

- old friends and ex-girlfriends keep showing up one after another.

- big mistakes happen to me twice.

- my soles of my feet get painfully numb when I use the "squat" instead of the "sit-down".

- is reading people's blogs so entertaining esp. those of asians americans.

- does tartar sauce taste so good when eaten with french fries.

- can't I sleep early.

- I wanna try absinthe if there's the chance to.

- voices of those like Michael Bublé and Norah Jones sooth my nerves.

- don't I have a digicam to snap flicks and post pics up here.

- people whom I have a lil' more faith in and still get disappointed by them.

- do people not understand that there are other people out there that has strong views on boundaries and respect.

- must misinterpretations and complications occur unnecessarily.

- are you reading this shit even.


Current track: Dean Martin - Sway
Current quote: "Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there." - Josh Billings (1818-85)



Fucking beautiful.

Current soundtrack: Michael Damian - Was it nothing at all
Current mood : Got off being annoyed not long ago



This blog is getting depressing as I'm not doing really well at the moment but things will get better. Will try to blog more often, yeah? I don't wanna lose my imaginary fan club you know, heh.
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You guys can stop worrying about me. I'm ok and things are getting better. I officially take her as a friend now and no more than that. I'm really moving on and looking forward to meeting new people.

Thank you again to those who followed up on me through this whole time. I'll never forget you guys. :)


Oh, Gemaine gave me something really sweet a while ago as a consolation. Apart from the get-well-soon-and-you-can-lean-on-me-when-times-are-bad postcard, there's this semi-rollable lil' toy truck which you open the top cover to find it full of chocolates and candies in it. Makes me feel like a child just let loose in the toy section, all over again. It's good. Thank you, Gemaine! :D
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Mom's going on an Europe trip next month, with her long-time boyfriend of more than 13 years already. He migrated to perth since about 11-12 years ago. They visit each other once or twice per year. How sad is that. It's about time they enjoy some deservingly good personal time together from a lifetime of labour. Not that they're retiring anytime soon though.

I didn't think much of overseas romance throughout my lifetime. It would be like living on memories. Painfully, I might add. Didn't think anything like that could even last a month, let alone more than a decade.

But her story inspires me. Like, nothing is impossible 'cause love wouldn't allow it.


Took mom to Jack's Place yesterday for her birthday lunch. The quality of the food there is Terrible with a capital T.

Starters: soup wasn't thick nor tasty nough, garlic bread was obviously not fresh from the oven even. They're even worse than 7/11 take-outs.

Main dish. Was expecting better stuff but to be disappointed again. Sirloin steak (medium rare) wasn't even properly done, peas doesn't appeal to me, ever, french fries was generally dull tasting, hard to munch on and not even salty. They even added fried onion(?!) for Christ's sake. Like, wtf.

Even the tea that came with dessert was bad, seriously. The only good thing was strawberry ice cream accompanied with little cubes of watermelon.

I'm not a good cook and neither should I criticise but at least I have relatively good taste buds which are trustworthy. They used to be so much better during the 90's. Now, Jack's Place has become Junk's Place.


Got a haircut after lunch. Makes me look like somekinda taiwanese punk. Other than that, pretty much an average cut. Dammit, so much for 23 bucks. At least I get free tea and it's better than Junk's Place.


We also get!

Things we can get:

- jokes
- disgusted with ourselves
- irritated with drivers on the road
- shortchanged
- screwed up

Things we should get:

- drinks
- her phone number
- driven to work/airport in big, expensive cars
- air tickets to exotic destinations
- a sugar mommy/daddy

Things we will get:

- horny
- bad breath in the morning
- hungry
- nostalgic
- spam

Things we might get:

- slapped
- killed tomorrow
- picked up
- prank calls
- a fuck buddy


Ok, it's getting lame. Later.

A lot had been thrown at me and I meant that in more ways than one. It made me shaky, had been really, really tough to handle everything that's going on in my life at this point of time. Sometimes I wonder how I stand strong against everything that's thrown at me. Guess it only makes me stronger.

Work is hell. Hell is an understatement. If I were a hitman, my superiors' names would be on the top of my shitlist in big block letters. They totally ruined my weekend for me, especially when I have a rare 2 days off instead of one. I have totally no mood for anything, anything at all.
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On a lighter note, I suddenly have the urge to walk, just walk. Something very new to me. I guess it's a form of relieving my stress and depression? So I walked home from Holland V last night after a gathering with Lisa and gang... well, ok maybe not all the way. Got tired somewhere before reaching Gleneagles and took a cab home.
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Off day today, initially planned to get my hair cut but changed my mind due to sudden lack of mood. At one point of time, I was generally quite frustrated with the idea of hair growth and hair cuts, I thought of how great it would be if we humans have the ability to control hair growth, maybe by pulling your ears or something (ie. left for extend, right for retract). It would be so much convenient and cost saving.


Some things to do with "hair control":

- Freak the hell outta my mom while making like Cousin It.

- Bald is sexy, according to some. Man, I would make it as smooth as my ass *evil grin*

- If I suddenly feel gay or transexual, I will braid my hair, or tie ponytails and dress up in female or tight clothings and be feminine for the day. Oh yeah baby, yes I will.

- Instead of the guessing game, play the how-fast-can-your-hair-extend game. Presumely if everyone in the club was doing that, people who just paid and enter would be seeing a disco of sadakos pulling on their left ears.

- Hang from the ceiling above unsuspecting male toilet patrons, slowly extending hair. *unzips*... *pee*... *whistle*... "...GAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!" *sprays all over the place* " ... Damn."
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Anyway, I digress. I treasure my off days as they come once per week. For the past two months, mostly every off day has been cramped up with activities, previously hung out with val, presently hanging out with others. Gonna dread the upcoming off days which I have nothing or no one to look forward to. Everyone's gonna go on with their lives, back to overseas studies, work, etc and there will be no time spared for a bugger like me.
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Nevertheless, my surprise pillar of strength at the moment is Lisa. Been hanging out with her a lot, having her for company to stone/talk/do anything with is comforting. Maybe it's because that we are both single child without siblings, or that we'd been through quite a fair bit of shit. I'm starting to feel much more a man now, my own man, which is starting to grow on me again. I found the courage again to make decisions, even some necessary ones which sometimes might be forced to but for a greater good eventually.

Lisa, here's a tribute to you for helping me get a grip on myself. Your constant support in and out of the day has been soothing, distracting, amazing, and the list goes on. In this short space of time, I find you're a good friend + listener, potentially greater one in the future and hope that we'll continue to hang all the way to see the day that we bum in our paradise. ;)
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List of movies(and upcoming ones) which i wanna catch:

- I, Robot

- The Village

- The Notebook

- Farenheit 9/11

- Collateral

- The Terminal

- The Incredibles


Dammit, that's sixty bucks.